Monthly Archives: February 2015

Behind Every Child who is Confident is a Parent who was Confident First

Where does self-trust or confidence come from? I believe that it comes from many places, some obvious and some less so and this list is just a few that came to my mind while contemplating “confidence” and writing this blog: From our inner compass, our intuition, our inner voice From accepting ourselves as who we are From knowing ourselves and knowing and respecting our boundaries From knowing that our parents have faith and trust in us From trying something new From accomplishments, no matter how small From receiving amplifying feedback on our strengths and what is working From celebrating success From contributing and knowing you have made a difference From being recognized, heard and validated From courage? (Do you think that confidence comes from courage or does courage come from confidence – that’s an interesting one!) From believing in ourselves – where does this belief originate from? Our parents then ourselves, or ourselves and then our parents? From feeling safe, accepted and protected From knowing and having a deep sense of belonging From having secure boundaries From knowing where others stand I also believe that a large part of gaining confidence can come from KNOWING that those who surround you …Read more →


Dear YPP, My kids just won’t stop bickering, fighting and being horrible to each other. It happens all the time and I don’t know how to deal with it anymore. No matter what I do, it just keeps getting worse. Please help. Dear Parent, This is a challenge that all parents face but one that with the right tools and approach can be managed very effectively. The first thing I always like to think of, as with any behavior challenge, is: What is the purpose of the behavior? Generally the motivating factor behind this type of behavior is: A child striving to seek significance within the family and/or A child trying to get the parents involvement and attention The child is often trying to assert him/herself, establish the hierarchy and see if they can pull rank on their sibling. It’s an even higher accomplishment to pull rank on Mum/Dad and get Mum and/or Dad on side in the process! Very often in these situations, parents do not witness the exact chain of events leading up to the moment of conflict and often base their reaction / response on what has typically happened in the past or what they think might …Read more →


I would like to introduce you to Meryl who is a Parenting Facilitator who I have the pleasure of occasionally working with. She has written this wonderful piece on Curiosity that I wanted to share with you. I hope you enjoy it! I became an Adlerian Parenting Facilitator after raising my three boys who are now currently in various stages of university and transitioning career choices. I was fortunate to have 21 years of parenting support and learning from my parenting mentor, which positively affected us as individuals and as a family. I have great compassion for all parents, as I understand the joys and challenges you are all going through on a daily basis.  Louise suggested I write a blog about parenting and I had great difficulty choosing one topic. However, I decided to write about a parenting skill that I discovered worked well for me and helped me thrive and survive parenthood: curiosity. Adlerians teach the four C’s (Betty Lou Bettner), which Louise regularly makes reference to: Connect Capable Count Courage These are important concepts for our children and ourselves, but I discovered four C’s of my own that helped me through an array of developmental stages and …Read more →


(Images courtesy of Momentous Institute) I find it quite incredible to think that the brain is the only organ we are born with that is not fully developed at birth. Experts believe that the brain is actually only fully developed at sometime in our early 20’s! Scientists also now know that the brain is plastic, which means that regardless of age, we can teach it new tricks. As parents, we have an incredibly important role to play in ensuring that our child’s brain is given the best opportunity to allow it to develop and grow into the best brain it can be, from both a cognitive and social and emotional perspective. According to many experts, in order to really nourish our child’s brain, we need to get back to basics. I like to think of a child’s brain as needing to be exercised, trained and rested very specifically and age appropriately in order for it to grow to it’s maximum potential. These basics almost form the scaffolding for the brain to then hold and integrate the detail gained from the likes of educational programs and all that it will be offered as an adult. Basic brain science The brain is …Read more →