Back To School – Back To YOU!

Here on the West coast of Canada, many of us are on the “Back To School” countdown. My kids have 10 days of holidays left. That means that I have 9 days to prepare for it!

The lists keep growing and as much as I don’t want the holidays to end, deep down, I know I am ready to get back into my full work rhythm. However, if I am not careful, I can get totally lost and submerged in all the busyness.

This is exactly why the September theme in The Conscious Family Organizer is Fresh Start.

During the summer holidays, as much as it has been good to be off the grid, we have not usually had much time to ourselves and have kind of got used to it? Yes?

Come September, this is not the best place to find ourselves…

We get by on less time to ourselves during the holidays because it is the “holidays”. However, now that the holidays are coming to an end, “time for you” needs a jump start to get you off to a fresh start. If you leave it as it is, trust me, the next few months will come and go, it will suddenly be December and then it will be the New Year and you will still be caught up and lost in the busyness.

To be on top of our game, for ourselves and for our children, we have to give to ourselves. I know, you hear “self-care” all the time these days and you know that you should do it, but it’s hard. I get it. There’s always a seemingly good reason to not do it. Something “more” important. Please hear me out on this: there is nothing more important. It is the least selfish of acts and we all have to do it. Like have to!

What self-care practices are you going to kick off with?

For me, the best thing I can do for myself is meditate. It is hands down the most rejuvenating thing I can do for myself. And, as well as this, a few times a day I STOP and consciously tap into the present moment. I press pause and find my breath. I slow down. I focus on ME.

This is what helps inspires me to go for the hike, get down to some serious work, savour the taste of and be appreciative of an afternoon cup of tea, commit to my yoga practice (aka put it in my organizer because then I will go), make a healthy dinner and simply treasure and lap up just BEING.

This moment of BEING, of silence, fuels my creativity and inspiration for life.

What are you going to do to find some space for YOU?

This month I want to help you transition to finding some space for YOU in your busy life as a parent. Let’s face it, life is busy but when we slow down and nourish ourselves, the busyness is never so bad.

Throughout September, in The Conscious Parent Community Facebook Group, in conjunction with The Conscious Family Organizer, I’m going to be giving you more ideas to help you get off to a Fresh Start, create space, find ways to get back on the “self-care” wagon, honour your “time for you” practices and intentions and put some joy and ease back into your life.

Here’s to making September all about YOU. Because trust me, doing so will help you be the parent your child needs you to be!

Are you ready to make a Fresh Start? I know I am and I’d love for you to join me. Start by purchasing your copy of The Conscious Family Organizer here.

I’ll see you in The Conscious Parent Community Facebook Group where you will receive parent support all year long. It’s going to be awesome!

Consciously Yours,

LouiseSig-F8981D

PS. You have to purchase a copy of the organizer in order to join The Conscious Parent Community Private Facebook Group

 

 

Need Some Energy?

My kids are currently on their Spring Break vacation. I work from home and we are all at home for the holiday. From years of Spring Breaks, I also know that by the end of them, if I don’t parent well, fix up my act and get it right, I have been known to morph into some form of deranged beast! Why? I get tired from nagging. Tired from entering into the arguments. And tired from not having done enough for myself and/or had enough time to myself. The 8 words below have become my best friends. They always help preserve my energy, my sanity, allow me to work from home AND enjoy the holidays: Stay Calm In The Heat Of The Moment Think back to a time you had a disagreement with one of your children: What was it over? ………….. Probably something small and not worth the argument! How quickly did you get drawn in? ………………. So fast you were in before you even knew it! How did you feel during the argument? ………………… Probably awful! How did you feel after it? ………………….. Guilty, exhausted and even worse because you acted just like your child and you are …Read more →

The Controlling Child Is Out Of Control

In order to understand the patterns of control, we have to dig a little deeper and understand why they might be there. With the best of intentions, because we all want what is best for our child, we turn to control under the clever disguise of: “my child need’s me to do it”, “this is best for my child”, “this will protect my child”, “this makes it easier for my child”. Control wears many hats… We do it to avoid discomfort for ourselves and for our child and we do it because we fear of what might happen if we don’t. “If I don’t do his laces up for him, we are going to be late…”  “If I don’t do his homework for him, he will never finish it…” “If I don’t force him to practice his piano he will fail his exam…” “If I don’t expose him to lots of new things he will never be successful…” “If I don’t put him into extra Math, he will never get the A. If he doesn’t get the A, he won’t get into a GOOD college…” “If I don’t nag, he will never remember…” And so it goes on. How might …Read more →

Chasing The Extraordinary

With the holiday season fast approaching, I think that it is important to continue to find ways to slow life down to a pace that satisfies ours and our children’s deepest needs and, to take the pressure off ourselves in as many ways as possible. With that in mind, the theme for December is going to be: Accepting The Ordinary. There is so much pressure on us to be extraordinary today, especially so at this time of year. Pressure to succeed. Pressure to fit it all in. Pressure to be happy. Pressure to make sure that our children don’t miss out. Pressure to get ahead. Pressure to get an extraordinary gift. Pressure to put a HUGE feast on the table. Pressure to escape the concept of ordinary. What is so wrong with ordinary? Why do we need the “extra”? When we strive to make every experience in life extraordinary; do extraordinary things, wear extraordinary clothes, do extraordinarily well, be extraordinary, we put incredible pressure on ourselves to be something that at the end of the day, we might not be capable of and the situation cannot bring us. And, in doing so, we can put extraordinary pressure on our children. …Read more →

Slow Down, You Move Too Fast

For me, around now, with the Halloween festivities been and gone, life can start to feel full. I use the word full over busy because I feel it is a less overwhelming perspective! I was chatting to some moms the other night and many of them are feeling similarly and in need of a break. Here’s the reality: If we are feeling this way, the chances are that our kids will be feeling it too. I know that my kids are. There’s more complaining about things and having to go out again. And compared to many, mine really don’t do a lot. With this in mind, I thought that the perfect theme for November would be to find ways to slow down. Taking regular speed checks in order to slow life down to a more compatible pace is a good thing. I think this has to also extend beyond simply slowing our external lives down, to include finding ways to slow our minds down. The mental clutter and constant chatter can be draining. That’s going to be the focus for next week’s “Parenting Tip Of The Week”. Stay tuned. One of my favourite external speed check interventions is going for …Read more →

“You Can’t Control Me, You Are NOT Me, Please Stop”

The theme for October is going to be around the subject of control. I’m guessing that there is probably no parent out there who has not had a run in with it in some way shape or form! In order to understand the patterns of control, we have to dig a little deeper and understand why they might be there. With the best of intentions, because we all want what is best for our child, we turn to control under the clever disguise of: “my child need’s me to do it”, “this is best for my child”, “this will protect my child”, “this makes it easier for my child”. Control wears many hats… We do it to avoid discomfort for ourselves and for our child and we do it because we fear of what might happen if we don’t. “If I don’t do his laces up for him, we are going to be late…”  “If I don’t do his homework for him, he will never finish it…” “If I don’t force him to practice his piano he will fail his exam…” “If I don’t expose him to lots of new things he will never be successful…” “If I don’t put …Read more →

Back To School, It’s Time For YOU?

The kids are back to school and it’s busy… Every year I expect that somehow life will instantaneously and miraculously become easier because the kids are out the house and back at school but it never seems to work out that way! There is so much to do, arrange, organize, buy, set up. The list just never gets shorter. Add to this, for many of us, the schedules then kick in and the driving starts and it can leave us feeling with that urrrggghhhhh feeling all over again. At this time of the year, if we are not careful, WE can get lost in all the busyness. So, with that said, the theme for this month is going to be on how you can create some space for YOU. In order to be on top of our game, both for ourselves and for our children, we have to give to ourselves. I know, you hear “self-care” all the time these days and you know that you should do it, but how many of us actually commit to it? We need to pay attention to this. We need to be aware of how WE are, what we are doing, how much …Read more →

The Biggest Obstruction To The Parent Child Relationship? Parental Fear

The theme this month is going to be on unraveling our FEARS and the HUGE role and impact that fear has on our parenting. You might be thinking to yourself: “Fear, what fears, I’m not scared… What is there to be afraid of?” According to Dr Shefali Tsabary the author of The Conscious Parent, Out of Control and The Awakened Family: “The rise of the parental ego is the fundamental obstruction between parents and their children”. She strongly believes that: “Fear is the cornerstone of all our reactive emotions and reactive energy, especially around our loved ones. Even our angry or worried reactions”. It is our fears that drive our inner voice, our ego and it is for much of the time that this voice drives us. Being conscious of this and being willing to be aware of this is THE only way in which to prevent it. Dr Shefali has really helped me understand this and I hope that I can help you. Our inner voice is always with us. However, it is only when we develop an awareness for it (an inner voice/ego radar detector or EgoGPS) for when it is in the driver’s seat, taking us down …Read more →

Shaping Our Children’s Digital Behaviour

At the beginning of the year when I was putting together this annual parent coaching plan for you I had penciled in “Technology” as being the topic we would explore for July. Over the last week, having spoken to many parents, my hunch was right. Many of you are concerned about how you are going to manage your children’s screen diets during the holidays. With that in mind, welcome July, welcome to the holidays and welcome to the huge subject of Screens and Devices and how we can find ways to live with technology so that we control it and it does not control us. It’s a tough one… Having read books on the subject, advice column after advice column and blog after blog on this topic, there is undoubtedly a lot of great information out there on this subject. However, in many of the “solutions” and “tips” offered on how to manage the impact of this on our family lives, I find that there is often one key piece of information that is missing – the profound effects of role modeling.  More often than not, these “writings” imply that it is our children who have the problem. I believe that …Read more →

Get This Right And Summer With The Kids Just Got A Whole Load Easier

June is here and with all that the end of the school year typically brings and summer on the horizon, I felt that a good theme for us to explore and tease out this month would be the subject of EXPECTATIONS. I’ll take a bet that there is not a parent reading this who expects a relaxing June because, knowing what we do about this time of year, it would be unrealistic! I’ll take another bet that almost every parent reading this has somewhat mixed emotions about the holidays. Yes? Excited but at the same time a tad apprehensive about having the kids around all day every day for two whole months? I hear you. I feel it too. I am hoping that by reading this blog and the following weekly tips pertaining to this, that you will be able to make this summer the best one yet. I believe that with a little bit of planning and organization, the overwhelming, busy, crazy-ness typical of June can be made a little easier. Here are a few ideas for you:  Do not schedule anything that does not HAVE to be done into June View your life as being FULL rather than …Read more →