PROACTIVE PARENTING SOLUTIONS from YPP Dear YPP, “My 7 year old son has started to become a bit destructive with things and just recently threw a toy down the stairs and it broke. It was his little brother’s favorite toy and he is really upset. We got a call from the Day Care he goes to saying that he has also been a bit destructive with the toys there. We don’t know what to do. Please help.” Dear Mum, Thank you for reaching out to us regarding your son. Please be assured that this is not an unusual behavior and many kids go through this stage but, having said this, it is something that you probably want to nip in the bud. In these situations I like to think about what we would like the child to learn from his actions and the use of consequences can be a useful parenting tool for dealing with such things. Consequences do not need to be really harsh and nor must they be seen as a punishment in order for them to work. They work best when they are applied consistently, firmly yet kindly and teach the child a valuable lesson: one that …Read more →

The use of consequences and limit setting are both positive forms of discipline that can be used to modify behavior and help foster intrinsic motivation in our children. The use of these will ultimately help guide and teach our children to make wise choices and choose socially responsible behaviors. I think that sometimes consequences can be made to be more complicated than they actually are. I have set this out to give you different situations that might call for consequences, how to devise them and apply them effectively. 3 Different Situations for applying Consequences 1. For when you have identified a recurrent behavior challenge Where possible it is definitely easier to have a consequence pre-thought so when the behavior unfolds, you have the consequence at the ready. It is a great idea to think of behaviors/actions that happen frequently in your home that result in conflict. Then decide upon a course of action and consequence so everyone knows in advance what will happen if or when…….. Toys are left out Bar wrappers are on the floor in the car Cereal plates are left out on the counter Clothes are all over their bedroom floors Field hockey cleats are left on a …Read more →